Question
I've been greatly surprised when waves of grief come from seemingly nowhere and I go under. My husband has been very patient and helpful, and my kids are very sympathetic, but none of them seem to understand why this is so deep.
Answer
Your description of waves of grief is one I have heard many times...I've also experienced it. It is a normal and natural response to grief especially in the first months (but not limited to the first few months).
I'm not surprised your husband and kids don't get it. Family members are often the worst place to look for support. Think about this...your kids have never experienced such a loss. They still have both their parents. How could they possibly understand the depth of your loss?
The best place to find support is from people who have experienced or are experiencing a similar loss. Friends who have lost a parent may help, and support groups are almost always a great option.
Take good care,
Susan
In How to Survive Your Grief I discuss many of these issues...
The Wave Effect on page 3
Difficulty Getting Along with Family page 84
People Worrying About You page 91
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